Most weeks I schlep out to the shops with my parents to have coffee and do a bit of shopping. On one such occasion, we were unpacking groceries into the boot of my parents car. We heaved bag after bag until there was no more room.
"Christ, we must EAT!' my mother remarked. I laughed and agreed. My life is a non-stop round of food food FOOD.
Thinking about what food to buy, buying the food, putting it away. Preparing the food, cooking the food, serving the food. Then doing this all over again infinitum. As much as I love food, it can get a bit repetitive and dreary at times.
I know, I know. First world problems, for sure. I am certainly grateful for the abundance of food available to me. That I never have to go hungry.
Luckily, there are not too many foods I dislike. I was rather more picky as a child. This was the result of being thoroughly spoiled by my mum's superb culinary ability. I swear she could have been Margaret Fulton or someone, only BETTER. As a child,I turned my freckled nose up at the inferior offerings others presented me with.
Store bought cakes or apple pie? Poison.
Chunky hearty soups? Yuck.
Tinned spaghetti? The HORROR.
If only such an attitude had persisted into adulthood. I'd be svelte and smug instead of plump and sheepish. These days I'll pretty much eat anything that isn't nailed down. And let's be real, probably try to prise off anything that IS nailed down.
Well, ALMOST anything. There are a select few foods that even this glutton isn't too thunderstruck about.
Such as:
CELERY
Stringy, bland, chewy and just plain BLAH, celery must be one of the most joyless foods nature provided. Naturally, celery is good for you. Low in calories, packed with anti-oxidants, and supposedly, calming for the nervous system. So the internet tells me, anyway. Must be true, right. 😉
In short, a healthy snack option. A shame I'd rather snack on my own toe nails. I CAN eat it disguised in a stir-fry, soup or coleslaw, but it's still not my favourite. As for munching on a stalk for the sake of it - it's a definite NO from me.
COTTAGE CHEESE
Often teamed with the above celery is this delectable delight. Except it isn't. Delectable, that is. Or delightful in any way whatsoever. I'm not going to describe what it reminds me of. You can probably guess. In a bid to be healthy, I foolishly purchased a tub of this chunder. Oops, I said it...
It's now languishing in the fridge. I need to chuck it out NOW instead of avoiding the inevitable. Why do torture myself?
SARDINES
I just don't like them. They're too... fishy...
Surprisingly, I quite like canned tuna, and even salmon. But sardines make me shudder. And just to make it worse, you can also buy them swimming in tomato sauce. Bleerrrggghhh.
Maybe I just haven't tried fresh ones. I don't know. But for now, it's not just a no. It's a HELL, NO!
BRUSSELS SPROUTS
These little fart balls from hell are no doubt packed with nutrition. I don't care. Put them in front of me and I will pout and refuse to eat them with the sheer determination laced with disgust of your average three year old.
Nope, nope, nopity NOPE.
OTHER FOODS I AM AMBIVALENT ABOUT:
TINNED BEETROOT
I must admit I have a bizarre love/hate relationship with this staple of good old-fashioned Aussie hamburgers. Once in a blue moon I crave and covet some beetroot with the intensity I usually reserve for cakies. Then, just as quickly, it absolutely revolts me. I cannot even bear to look at it, swimming in a sea of it's own crimson blood in a container in the fridge. Inevitably, the container ends up spilling and resembling a murder scene, and I'm left wondering why I bothered indulging my short lived craving.
BAKED BEANS
More farty goodness. Don't get me wrong, a good old baked bean jaffle with cheese can be just the thing on a bleak winter's day when you feel like pretending it's still 1978. Just me?
Then, inexplicably, it's just NOT. Baked beans are another love/hate kind of thing for me. Sometimes they hit the spot. Other times they hit the garbage can. Fast.
There you have it. The foods I dislike.
There are probably others, but why waste time and energy on them when there's cake and chocolate in the world. That's what I say.
What about you?
What foods do you dislike?
