To Be A Bogan, Or Not To Be A Bogan? That Is The Question

As you know by now, Micky Blue Eyes, the boys and I live in the truly glamorous area of Sydney I've called Boganville.  The blog title is a bit of a give away. 

This begs the obvious question.  Are we, indeed, bogans? I must confess, I'm not really sure that we are.

I am currently sitting here in my most alluring outfit of old tracky daks and a polar fleece jacket that I have owned for years. In a home that is in utter disarray. A ramshackle old fibro box.  All extremely classy.  We will usually have some sort of elegant and refined meal for dinner. Like bangers and mash.

On the other hand, I'm not terribly fond of many of the things that the stereo-typical bogan supposedly is.Which, according the web-site Things Bogans Like include:

• Reality TV
•  Acca Dacca
•  Tatoos
• Meat Lovers Pizza
• Pauline Hanson, and erm..
•  Hot Asian Chicks

I mean, I have nothing against Hot Asian Chicks, of course, they're perfectly fine.  They're just not really  my thing, if you know what I mean.

The list is very comprehensive and can be found here.


Frankly I'm not even entirely sure what Dikileaks is, which is #205 on the list.  Can anybody tell me? On second thoughts, do I really want to know?

In fact the only things (or celebrities really), that I do like, after a quick squiz at that list, are Michael Buble and Sarah Jessica Parker, in spite of her alleged resemblance to a horse. I must admit, I am also rather partial to a mild curry.

However, not one of my boys has a rats tail. Or a wacky, weirdly spelt name that sounds like something out The Days Of Our Lives. Only worse.  You know, something like Blayze or Foxx or Jaxxon.  Apparently those are just some of the Baby Names Bogans Like, as well as:

• Calcypher (I guess you could shorten it to Cal)
• Caramel ( I thought this was a milk shake flavour, not a name. Silly me.)
• Chaos (well, children do sometimes cause chaos so it could be apt)
• Chardonnay ( Yes please, but chilled and in a wine glass, not on my child's birth certificate)
• Frolic (once again, it could be apt where children are concerned as they often do. Frolic, that is)
• Luscious  (Sounds a tad like a porn name, but maybe that's just me)

I could go on, but the list is rather long. 

In addition to my boys having boring names, I am so tedious and tragic that I don't have any tatoos or piercings.  To make matters worse, my favourite music is Carpenters. In other words, Nanna music or elevator music.  Doesn't exactly scream Bogan does it? (It may scream mega nerd from hell, but that's another story.)

A woman this classy
could never be a Bogan.
Nope. No way.

Of course, as the site points out, the old concept of the Bogan has evolved  from just the flannie wearing, mullet-headed, heavy metal loving, garden variety Bogan to the more upwardly mobile Cashed Up Bogans.  These Bogans favour McMansions, Masterchef and rather pretentious weddings.

As I've mentioned in previous blogs, I did sport a quite fetching mullet-perm as a teenager, but that was when I was suffering from *TES, as opposed to being a bogan.

So, I can only come to the logical conclusion that this is yet another of those little ironies in my life. I'm a non-bogan living in Boganville. Yep, definitely not a bogan at all. 


Now that we've settled that, I think I'll go put my Uggs on, my feet are freezing.

*Tragic Eighties Syndrome

Linking up with Kirsty from My Home Truths for I Must Confess.

Do you like 'Bogan Style' Baby Names? Or anything that Bogans Like?

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The Box

Home is a charming, quaint, little cottage. ie. an old, tiny fibro in Boganville, obviously. We desperately need to upgrade or renovate. 

"It has potential." Micky Blue Eyes commented when we originally bought the home.  Yes, it certainly did have potential. In the following ways:

• Potential to grow mould on the roof and ceilings of the front bedrooms.
• Potential for the roof to leak (tragically our boys will never be able to thank us during their wedding speech for bringing them up 'under a roof that didn't leak'. This is how Mick thanked his parents during his speech at our wedding).
• Potential to cause all five of us to suffer from lifelong paralysing claustrophobia.
• Potential to cause chills in winter as it so cold. Brrrrrrrrr.
• Potential to feel like a sauna during summer as it is so hot. Phew.
• Potential to become a gigantic, cluttered mess- FAST, due to lack of space.
• Potential to look rather pitiful among some of the other renovated or knock down/rebuilt  homes popping up on our street.

Still, it is our house. We own it, not a bank. Aren't we lucky?  So we try to make the best of it.  Mick started painting. I helped.  (Making him cups of coffee is helping, isn't it?)

  It is half done.  Hopefully the half done look is in, as it may not be finished for another ten years.  The other day we noticed that Master 3 has already helpfully scribbled on the fresh paint. A very cutting edge look indeed, so we might just go with it.

We also have a lovely combination of mismatched, dodgy furniture, including a sofa bed that doesn't match the two dilapidated recliners.  A kitchen sideboard cupboard with the glass missing out of the doors.  And a wardrobe in the boys bedroom which can't be shut. All so very classy and in keeping with our true bogan status.

I'm sure our home could be a candidate for a Home Beautiful shoot.  If there was a Home Beautiful for Feral Bogans issue that is.  Unfortunately, Micky Blue Eyes and I are of the stressy types who would not be able to sleep at night with the worry of a massive debt/mortgage over our heads. Others wouldn't be able to sleep at night in Boganville, ironically.  Me, I'm a born and bred bogan, so I don't know any different. So here we stay, debt free and bogans.

Meanwhile, we can always keep dreaming of the day we become Cashed Up Bogans and finally get that McMansion in Boganville Heights. It's always better to dream big, I find.

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